Fr. Jim's Gem
for
September 7, 2001



Now that the boat season is just about over, how do you like the following for “sailing the high cheese?” These are just a few recreational boat names logged by the 530,000 member Boat Owners Association of the United States (www.boatus.com/names). They were submitted by my friend, Evelyn Kolosick.

These are only a few of my favorites alphabetically arranged…
 
A  loan Again Men-O- Pause
Beeracuda Minnow Paws
Berth Control Moor-Onz
Boatrupt Notta-Yachta
Beeping Sleauty Nobar Toofar
Bow Movement Out to Lunch
Cod Squad O-Lay
Crewless Pair-A-Dice
Codfather Paradocs
Dock Holiday Rudder Chaos
Docked Wages Reel Broke
Dockster Reel Nauti
Ecubawtawitt Reel Wild
Freudian Sloop Sailing  Solution
Fahrfrumwurken Sail La Vie
Helmroids Sea's the Day
Here's Fishee..Fishee Sea Senor
In Solvent-sea Sea-Nile
It's O-Fish-Al Sea Ya
Jamaica-Me-Crazy Tax Seavasion
Just for the Hull of it U4EA
Keel-Joy Wa-Wa-Dot
Knot Again Y-Knot
Miss Conduct Yachta Yachta Yachta

SAFETY TIPS
Don’t ride in an automobile - they cause 20% of all fatal accidents.
Don’t stay at home - 17% of all accidents happen in the home.
Don’t walk in the street - 15% of all accidents occur to pedestrians.
Don’t travel by air, rail or water - 16% of all accidents are the result of these activities.
Only .001% of all fatal accidents occur in church…

OBVIOUSLY, THE SAFEST PLACE TO BE IS WORSHIPING HERE AT CHURCH!
  See you next Sunday!!

   submitted by Maureen Leslie
 

Only the lowly can see the highness of God.
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It’s funny how…
? we set our clocks to arise at 4:00 a.m. or 5:00 a.m. to be at the job by 7:30, yet when Sunday comes we can’t get to church by 11:30 a.m. to praise the One who gave us the jobs.
? small “our” sins seem, yet how big “their” sins are.
? we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says.
? so many church goers sing “Standing On the Promises”, but all they do is sit on the premises.
*************************************************
Ponderables:
? Don’t cry because it’s over; smile because it happened.
? Living on earth’s expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.
? Birthdays are good for you! The more you have, the longer you live.
? How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you are on.
? If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy?
? If Walmart’s lowering prices everyday, how come nothing’s free yet?
? Some mistakes are too fun to make only once.
? A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

     Love in Him,
     Fr. Jim

 

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